Outsourcing My Blog

OK, so I didn't write this.

You've probably seen it a million times, but it's funny. And it's not like it wouldn't be a kick-in-the-ass to try. So let me get my hair cut and do a little Christmas shopping and later I will share my Pecan-Pumpkin Pie recipe. (It's two, two, two pies in one!) And yes, it has booze in it too.

Enjoy!


From My friend Lynette- the best joke-teller I know!

Once again this year, I've had requests for my

  Tequila Christmas Cake recipe so here goes:

1 cup sugar
2 cups flour

1 tsp. baking powder
1 cup water
1 tsp. salt
1 cup brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
Nuts
1 bottle tequila
2 cups dried fruit

Sample the tequila to check quality

Take a large bowl;

check the tequila again to be sure it is of the highest quality.

Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer.

Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point, it is best to make sure the tequila is still OK.

 Try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.

Break 2 eggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
Pick the fruit up off the floor. (now pick yourself up off the floor)

Mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose
with a drewscriver.

Sample the tequila to test for tonsisticity.

Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something.

Check the tequila. Now shift the flour and strain your nuts.

Add one table. . .  Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.

Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner

Finally, throw the bowl through the window.
Finish the tequila and wipe the counter with the cat.

Merry MishMash  . . .  or Cherry Mistmas . . . or . . . oh, what the hell!! 

In my experience, clever food is not appreciated at Christmas. It makes the little ones cry and the old ones nervous.

Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.