The Grapes of Ralph*

My Darling husband came in the house a few days ago with 5lbs of grapes...which I suppose he picked off the grape tree or bush or, whatever. Oh wait a minute-- he informed me that he picked them off the grape vine in our yard. 

Who knew?

“Now what?” I asked. “Do the grapes magically turn into Cabernet?” We watched and waited and they did not. They did, however, start attracting fruit flies.

Today when he asked me if I wanted to go out on the lake- AGAIN- I looked around for an excuse and spotted the grapes. Great excuse! Or was it…..?

So after he had left, I threw the grapes in the blender. I figured if that contraption could blend a banana daiquiri it could smoosh grapes. And it did.

Then I cooked the grapes until they got nice and hot and started to pop.

Then I put them through a crazy-looking jelly strainer- there’s got to be a better way- and added sugar and made myself some grape jelly!

The kitchen is sticky. I am sticky, but can’t I wait to buy some old fashioned white bread and pull out the peanut butter. Suck it Smuckers!

*Apologies to Ralph Steadman.

We should all do what, in the long run, gives us joy, even if it is only picking grapes or sorting the laundry.
E. B. White